your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
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