I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
You called yourself Captain Aspirin and then tried to cure my headache by shoving pills up my nose. Fuck you becoming a nurse, you can't take care of me while you're drunk ever again. Ever.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
Randomize
