Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Betty ford says i'm here all night
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
Randomize
