he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
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