I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
