If I had a nickel for every time I've used a condom, I'd have... two nickels.
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
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