You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
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