This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
Randomize
