so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Randomize
