i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
She needs sedatives and a leash
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Randomize
