Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Randomize
