My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
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