I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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