Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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