That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
Randomize
