he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
