I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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