GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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