just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
Is that strawberry winking at me??
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
