Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize
