Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
