Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Randomize
