C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
