I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
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