Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
I just heard myself say the sentence "I'm gonna go to the bank then take a nap". 8 year old me just slapped my present self through the space-time continuum for being an old fuck.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Randomize
