The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
Randomize
