Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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