You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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