in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
My dermatologist just asked me, "what happened here?" referring to the bruising on my nipples. I told her I walked into a door. Thanks for that awkward moment.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Randomize
