So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
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hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
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I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
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