Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
You were trust falling into bushes
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