I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
