I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
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