i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
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