I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
Randomize
