even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
