He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Randomize
