wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
Because everytime she talks to you she goes in her room and plays Come Sail Away on repeat. Can't take this shit anymore Jake
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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