She is in my trunk
think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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