Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
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