at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize