Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
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