1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
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