Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
Randomize
