another moral hangover. fuck.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
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