I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Randomize
