It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
dude i'm inner monologue high
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
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