I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize
