Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
i out mim tonsoeep
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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