I am in a vortex of obligation.
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
Randomize
