Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
Randomize
